Welcome to another day of pretending the stock market is logical and Warren Buffett is our savior. You were just trying to check your watchlist or maybe find out if your retirement account can buy you anything other than cat food in 30 years, and now you’ve fallen into the infinite scroll pit of “BREAKING NEWS” and “2 Stocks to Buy and Hold Forever.” Let’s be honest. You didn’t come here to make rational investment decisions. You came here for hope . That little glimmer of financial optimism that maybe, just maybe, buying two overhyped, over-analyzed mega-cap stocks will catapult you into the upper-middle class. Again. And today’s Kool-Aid? A four-minute, algorithm-approved sermon from The Motley Fool titled "2 Warren Buffett Dividend Stocks to Buy and Hold Forever." That’s right. Forever . Because nothing screams sound investment advice like ignoring every financial development for the rest of your life. Buffett Said It, So It Must Be Good Let’s start with the basics: W...